Finding a Way

[shadow]

Asha looked again at the wolf walking next to her, still trying to figure out what was going on. Sure, the wolf said he was Sermon's brother, and it would explain why the other male had run off, but Asha had a feeling that it was a lie for several reasons. First of all, the wolf smelled like Sermon, even though he had his own scent, Sermon's was lying underneath, and if Preacher hadn't seen his "twin" in a long time, it wouldn't be there. Second, this wolf looked exactly the same as Sermon every mark was the same. Even the appearance of twins wasn’t that close.

Last was the thing that bothered Asha the most. Why hadn’t Sermon come back yet, or at least found some way to tell her where he was? She had thought that he was her friend, and he didn’t seem like the kind of wolf to just leave his friends completely when someone hi didn’t like was around. It scared her. She had really started to feel for the other even though she hated to admit it. She hated that he would just leave her like this. At the thought, she tried not to let her wings slide lower down her back or drop her head in depression, but she couldn’t help it. She just couldn’t keep up her normal perkiness with his other wolf with her.

‘I have to talk to him, it’s the only way I’m gonna find out anything’ she thought to herself. She then turned to her current companion. “Hey Preacher, can I talk to you for a minute? It’ll only be a sec, then we can keep going, if you don’t mind.”

[oatmeal]

[style=font: 11px calibri; letter-spacing: 1px; text-align: right; width: 412px; background-color: #282823; padding: 2px 10px; color: #8f9cab;]like a preacher with a lie

Preacher lifted his eyes and turned to face Asha. He had an expressive face, but his expressions all had a cocky tone to them. He knew that he was dashing, gentlemanly, and handsome. He played that role well. He sometimes could tell wolves that Sermon had met if they were important to him. There was a sense of deja vu when he looked at Asha that told him that Sermon felt some connection to her. Preacher was sure that the winged wolf wasn't an enemy. She didn't seem to have a mean bone in her body.

However, they had been walking, side by side, in silence. Their companionship was slightly uneasy, for both of them were strangers to each other. But he continued because he was, presumably, looking for Sermon the same as Asha was. But then, she broke the silence.

“Hey Preacher, can I talk to you for a minute? It’ll only be a sec, then we can keep going, if you don’t mind.”

He stopped and was slightly excited. Perhaps this female had a change of heart. Perhaps she did want to have a bit of fun. He wore cocksure expression and said, “Well, Asha, ma'am, I'm happy to share a coupla words with such a pretty lady.” He winked, as if he suspected that maybe she wanted to open up to him, be a friend.

Ashy, me and shadow will take care of some Sermon & Asha stuff and then you can have Skye join in <3

[shadow]

Asha looked at the other wolf as he accepted her invitation to talk, and as he winked at her. She looked away, she had never thought herself to be pretty, but a lot of other wolves seem to think that about her nowadays..... 'No, Asha focus!' she thought to herself as she sat down for the moment, giving her legs a rest for now. She then took a small breath, taking a moment to consider how she should begin to ask the questions that were running ragged in her head.

‘Where’s Sermon since I have a feeling he’s not your twin, who are you, why are you here, what do you intend to do with me…’ the list went on and on. She took another deep breath hoping it wasn’t too noticeable to the other, and finally decided on a question. “Preacher, I know you’re not Sermon’s brother. Do you know where he is, I’m getting worried about him. Please, don’t lie to me.” She connected her gaze to the other’s bright green gaze, knowing it was harder to lie to someone when you were looking in their eyes.

She really hoped this wolf gave her at least a little info, maybe where Sermon was. She really was starting to miss him terribly. Looking into those eyes made her realize once again just how much this wolf looked like him, how unnerving it was. Something was going on here, she knew as much. She just had to figure out what.

[oatmeal]

[style=font: 11px calibri; letter-spacing: 1px; text-align: right; width: 412px; background-color: #282823; padding: 2px 10px; color: #8f9cab;]the preacher tells the sermon

Preacher could read her eyes. Whoever Sermon was to her, it was someone who she cared about. He wasn't like Addie, who shouted the truth at every turn. Instead, he found that it was better to keep some secrets and to have some honor. This was Sermon's friend, not his. He had no right to intrude. Preacher averted his eyes, pointing his muzzle down, and smiling while shaking his head. “Now, Asha, I know what'cha tryin' with me. And I jus' cain't give you that kinda information.” He sighed.

“But you're right pretty thing, and I have got to at least tell you a lil' thing. You deserve as much,” Preacher said with a smile, trying to inject some good humor, uplift the seriousness of the situation. Preacher didn't particularly like serious business. He rather liked Asha—mostly because she seemed available and susceptible to his charms. But for all his daring ways and foolish decisions, he was a gentleman first of all and a gentleman knew that a lady always deserved a small favor.

Preacher walked backwards a few steps until it was easy for Asha to see his entire body. “So, where's Sermon?” the wolf asked playfully, drawling his words a bit. He grinned. “Y'know, he din't leave you in the least bit.” And Preacher jumped right to her, put his face in her face so that their foreheads touched. “I love ya; I really do, Miss Asha. But be careful 'round Sermon. And! Tell him to say, 'I'm right here', when he comes back.” The wolf winked and grinned.

Preacher stepped backwards to let some space between him and Asha's face. His tail lashed from side to side. He knew what was coming. He knew how much Sermon wanted back in control and how much he needed to be in control right now. So, he sat down, his accent gone, but his voice still gruff and deep. “So, Asha, Sermon didn't leave you because...”

The brown wolf's face seemed to become tenser. His cocksure smile tightened into a thin line. His friendly, squinted eyes moved so that they were sharp and calculative. His stance changed from that over-confident slack stance of Preacher's to Sermon's tidy, exact posture. There he was. Sermon.

Immediately, he saw Asha. He didn't know what happened since Preacher took over and worry filled his eyes. Did Preacher do anything to her? Did he hurt her in any way? He was about to speak, but didn't know what to say.

Preacher is nice. I need to have him doing dangerous things once in awhile. But Sermon is worried. Hope Asha and him figure stuff out <3

[shadow]

At the words "He didn't leave you in the least bit" Asha's heart jumped. So, he was close by? Did Preacher know where he was? Then the other wolf got so close so fast, it took a lot just not to jump when he was suddenly so close. She was suddenly very confused about what the other wolf was saying. Careful around Sermon? Why, what did he mean? Asha was suddenly a little frightened and more than a bit confused. He was really starting to creep her out as well.

As Preacher backed up she was about to ask what he meant, but he cut her off as she started to open her mouth. He started to say something about how sermon hadn't left her when he suddenly cut off. He suddenly seemed tense for a moment, and then started to shift his posture. Asha wanted to cry out, ask if he was ok, ask what was happening, but she was frozen in place, all she could do was watch.

Then, the other wolf looked at her again. No longer did she smell Preacher; no longer did she see him in this wolf's eyes. When she looked into his green gaze all she saw was Sermon. He looked so worried, and looked like he wanted to say something, but he didn't. Asha was almost glad he didn’t say anything, even though she couldn’t either for a brief moment. She knew something had happened, she didn’t know what exactly, but she knew it was Sermon that was standing in front of her now. She couldn’t have felt happier for a moment.

“S-Sermon, is it you? What happened, where did you go?” Her voice was shaky as she tried not to sound too happy that the Preacher was gone, she didn’t want to sound rude. Her voice did betray her though, happiness mixing with the surprise. Sermon hadn’t left her, he was here again. She was desprate to sak more, but she didn't want to swamp Sermon with questions. She tried her best to stay calm, but a shaky smile did appear on her face. He was back again, that was all that she really cared about, questions could come in later if they must.

[oatmeal]

[style=font: 11px calibri; letter-spacing: 1px; text-align: right; width: 412px; background-color: #282823; padding: 2px 10px; color: #8f9cab;]sermon's relief

Sermon saw her relief, her happy surprise. At first, he was standing still, like a deer in the headlights. Then, his frozen body began to melt. He found himself able to move. His first motion was a step towards Asha. He thought of saying the words he practiced. She wanted to know what happened, where he went. Sermon sighed. He knew, from the beginning, that them meeting each other was a bad idea. He could pull out now and leave Asha forever, but his heart refused. Serendipity forced them together.

He was calculative, but somehow, his mental equations made it seem like telling her was the best course of action. And so, he explained the way he planned to explain before Preacher reared his head. “Asha,” he began strongly but continued more gingerly, “sometimes, I'm... not myself.” He cleared his throat. This was hard to say. He wasn't Advent, who spewed everything out. Telling others didn't come naturally to him. He usually found a way to run off before something happened. And so, he was blunt.

“I have multiple personalities. There's four others, but I'm the original.” Sermon said, frankly. He then took it back. “Ah, I just don't know how to explain it.” It made him uncomfortable. He then moved closer to Asha. He usually didn't do that.

“I thought I would lose you. Did Preacher hurt you?” That was what he wanted to do. He felt the emotion bubbling to the surface. He kept close to her, let his actions speak what he couldn't find the words to say. He was not sure if what he felt was simply relief that Asha was here or if it was something more, but he just wanted to share that he cared about her.

He put his nose in her ruff. “But you stayed.” The way he said it was simple, matter-of-fact, but under the tone, his tenor voice revealed his worry.

Awwww. They are so cute together, honestly. Poor Sermon doesn't know how to phrase things. He's awkward all around.

[shadow]

Asha stayed rather still as Sermon began to explain himself. 'Multiple personalities huh, kinda like a mutation. Well, that explains some things' she thought as he moved closer. His next statement scared her. He thought he would lose her, over something like that? He asked if Preacher had hurt her and she shook her head a little. She was a little surprised when he buried his hose in her scruff, but she didn’t flinch or pull away, she liked it.

“Of course I stayed; I would never leave you Sermon. And there was no way you were going to lose me over this, y-you mean too much to me. That actually explains a lot.” She paused, trying to get her voice back under control; since it was shaking with all the emotion she was feeling right now. “That’s why you ran at the Pool, right? Because you felt Preached taking over or something am I right?” she rubbed her cheek against his gently. She had heard the concern in his voice, and was starting to become aware that he cared about her, maybe a lot more than she realized.

“Preacher didn’t hurt me at all, he was quite a gentleman actually, but it didn’t change the fact I wanted to see you again.” She took a moment to inhale his scent, comforted by the fact that it was all around her and purely his again. “Hey, look at me.” She pulled away so she could see his eyes again. “You’re not going to lose me, not over this, not over anything. I’m not going to leave you, not unless you want me to.” She then hesitated in her next move. Did she really want to do this? She pushed her doubt away as she licked his cheek, trying to be sweet, wanting him to know how she felt about him.

[oatmeal]

[style=font: 11px calibri; letter-spacing: 1px; text-align: right; width: 412px; background-color: #282823; padding: 2px 10px; color: #8f9cab;]in a sermon about love, you learn a lot

Sermon smiled when Asha said that she would never leave him over something like this. It was something big, to him at least. That she had only met one of his many personalities. How would she react to Pulpit? To Church? To Advent? She seemed to not mind Preacher, who Sermon was the most worried about, simply because the wily wolf seemed to put Sermon's needs on the backburner to make room for his own wild desires. He chose to be honest. “I ran because I didn't want you to know. And it's hard. Even though I can feel who I'm going to be next, I can't remember anything when I'm gone. It's like I'm tucked away and when I wake up, I'm disoriented. I have to use clues to figure out what happened. Who I was.”

He knew he hadn't been anybody other than Preacher. That he switched back without anybody coming between. The clues were there, he had to become highly observant in order to live. However, clues could be misread. However, in this moment, he was sure. He didn't feel tired or nervous or full of anxiety, which was what being Church always left him as. She seemed to understand that he was about to change—from his position of his transformation back into himself. That ruled out Pulpit, who was too young to understand how to set that up. Because she didn't know anything about the multiple personalities, he assumed she hadn't met Advent yet. That's how he knew that he had only been Preacher since the last time he was himself.

But Sermon was confused as to why Preacher didn't do anything to Asha. He half expected the wolf to mate with her, try to take her on a wild adventure, trick her, manipulate her, steal him to himself. He'd done this to him before. But it was with females who he didn't care about as much. Sermon hadn't had a companion for a long time. Perhaps he was wrong about Preacher. Perhaps he kept seeing the wolf through a lens of jealousy and it corrupted his view of him. He worried himself. He wondered if she kissed Preacher before she kissed him. If they were close, if they did anything. She did call him a gentleman.

But his fears disappeared when Asha kissed him sweetly on his cheek. A shy first kiss. She cared about him. But Sermon needed to make sure that she understood and was willing to accept what I love you meant when he said it to her and she said it to him. He wanted her to know what being his mate was. It was hard sometimes, but maybe, she could see that it was worth it.

He knew. He loved someone before. She loved him as well. Somewhere along the way, the memory had fractured, tucked away in one or two of the personalities that had developed since meeting his last love. He couldn't even remember if they had been mates. If they had puppies. How long they were together. But he understood the feeling. Love. It washed over him. Asha accepted him so far. There was no turning back now. They had been together for awhile. Traveling in the Springtime, it was bound to happen.

At the same time, he just wanted to kiss her. “Loving me is a mess,” he said simply before he leaned away, only to come back and return her kiss, tenderly licking her muzzle. If she stayed, she would be signing in on more than a simple relationship.

I have to say one thing: AWWWWWWWWWW

[shadow]

When Sermon said that it was hard for him, how hard he had had it in the past, Asha felt sorry for him, wanting to do something for him. She knew that she would find some way to help if he accepted her, she knew she could. Then, when he said that loving him was a mess, and kissed her back, Asha felt as though her heart had also grown wings. He loved her! He was going to accept her and her feelings for him. She could hardly believe it.

She had only been in love once before, a long time ago before she had become a loner. She hadn’t really gotten close to anyone since, and when she had met Sermon she had thought it was just going to be another encounter, but she had been wrong. She had fallen in love with him, and now he was accepting her. She was so overcome for a moment her eyes started to water with tears of joy and her throat closed up. She wanted to speak, but she couldn’t get the words out. Finally though, she found her voice and did her best to control it.

“I don’t care. I know I still have three other personalities to meet according to you, but it doesn’t matter. I love you, and that means I’ll deal with whatever I have to to be able to stay with you. Besides, I’m stronger than I look, I’m sure that we can find a way to deal with this.” She was just able to choke it all out, then moved to sit next to him, kissing him gently again before continuing. “Besides, if I’m with you than when you switch then I can tell you what happened when you get control again. You won’t have to go on guessing all the time. I love you Sermon, and nothing you can say or do will change that now, you got that?” She gazed into his eyes, trying to make out what he was thinking, but it was hard. She just hoped she hadn’t said anything wrong.

[oatmeal]

[style=font: 11px calibri; letter-spacing: 1px; text-align: right; width: 412px; background-color: #282823; padding: 2px 10px; color: #8f9cab;]sermon wants to find a pack... specifically, this one

Sermon was amazed by how much she chose to dedicate herself to him. And it made him fall more deeply in love with her. He loved Asha for loving him despite his disability. He was a strange wolf and he knew he was a hard wolf to love. He didn't know if she was truly up to it, but she seemed able and ready. She even seemed to understand her part in the relationship—helping him find some normalcy in life. Helping him understand where he was. What was happening. And, dare he say it, it might make things he thought were out of his reach attainable: Pack life and maybe even a family.

The moment was emotional. Even serious Sermon found himself with his eyes, hot with tears, ready to fall. He shut them to try to keep himself steady. He smiled, a bit proud of himself for lucking out for once. A bit happy that there was such a thing as love for him with his condition. He cleared his throat. “It'll be perfect.”

And it would. He could see him waking up from being gone. Instead of confusion, he'd find Asha's smiling face. And she would be telling him what he missed when someone else had taken over. Perhaps he should warn her of the types of personalities he had. She had met Preacher, who was, understandably, the least strange of the wolves that occupied him. How would she react to Pulpit? Would she be a good mother to him? How about to Church? Would she be able to overlook his oddness? Or Advent, his female personality, would they be friends? None of them knew that he had just signed up to be mates with Asha. It was as he said before: Loving him was a mess.

But, they would find a way.

Sermon felt ready with Asha. The first day of the rest of his life. He knew where they were. He recognized this place. He remembered hanging at the border lines, wishing that he could join. He didn't need to ask Asha. He didn't need to know what they were doing before because he knew what he wanted to do next. “Every day, I dreamed of having a life in a pack. And... I don't think I can do it alone. But with you... it seems possible. We're near a pack line. I know it's a big decision, but I think we should join. Together.” He smiled. He could feel his heart beating. She came this far. She loved him. He loved her. It seemed the next logical choice.

Asha and Sermon = <3 Anyways, Skye should come soonish, I believe ^_^

[shadow]

Asha smiled, excited and happier than she had ever been before. She had always dreamed of having a mate, someone who she would love and who would love her back. She had to admit that she had never thought that she would fall for someone like Sermon, but she hadn't really thought about stuff like that when she was younger. Then, when she had become a loner she had thought that all chances of a mate were gone forever. Now, Sermon had accepted her as his, something that she thought wouldn't even happen in her wildest dreams.

Then she heard him ask if she wanted to try to join a pack. Now she faltered. It had been so long, she wasn’t sure if they would accept her. She decided to say as much, since she didn’t want to keep secrets from Sermon. “I-I-I would like to try, but the last time I was forced out. I don’t know if they would accept me.” At first she averted her eyes from Sermon; she didn’t want to see disappointment that she was sure was there. He had seemed so hopeful, and she didn’t want to upset him. She took a shaky breath to steady herself before looking at him and standing slowly.

“But I want to try. Besides, I have you now.” She waited for him to stand, and then continued on. “So, what can you tell me about your other personalities? I want to at least learn a little about them if I can now, so I don’t get caught too off guard. If you don’t mind that is.” She wondered what the others were like, but once again she didn’t want to push. Right now, she just wanted to enjoy his company.

[oatmeal]

[style=font: 11px calibri; letter-spacing: 1px; text-align: right; width: 412px; background-color: #282823; padding: 2px 10px; color: #8f9cab;]it's now or never... or so the sermon goes

Sermon knew that Asha was going to ask that question. It seemed that every wolf who figured out his disorder wanted to know who he thought the personalities were. Thankfully, she already had met Preacher, so he didn't need to go through the whole list. But perhaps it would help if Asha knew what she was going to have to deal with. So, how to put this into words? Sermon knew the other wolves. He understood the essence of who they were in the way that someone who shared the same body only could. When the change was coming, sometimes it was quick, sometimes he tried to fight it and he could swear that he lasted a second longer as himself. But in the end, all that these struggles did was give him a full taste of who was next. And from this, he could tell Asha about the others, summarize them.

He cleared his throat. He wasn't used to this. But he could give the gist of it. Tell her what to expect, how to handle each wolf that took his body as his—or her—own. “Well...” he started nervously. “Other than Preacher, there's Pulpit. He's, well, he's just a puppy.” Sermon felt embarrassed. He imagined a wolf who looked just like him only with the intelligence and manners of a young cub. He bit his lip before continuing. “Then there's Church. He's rude, but that's just because he doesn't know how to be polite. He's scared of everything.” Sermon could recall waking up after being Church. Sore muscles and the frenetic mind still racing, leaving him even more confused and completely on edge. “Finally, we have Addie, er, Advent. She calls herself Addie. And well, she's a she. Treat her like one is all I can say about that.” His green eyes steadied themselves on Asha. “But, if this Alpha accepts me, surely you are more than qualified.” He offered a smile to his mate.

At least, right now, he was still himself. At least right now, he could function as a mate for Asha. “It's now or never.” Sermon lifted his muzzle and howled for the Alpha to arrive. A leap of faith. And, if the wolf chose to accept them? Well, he and Asha would find a way to function in the pack. Together.

Whooot. Asha & Sermon are gonna be awesome in this pack.

[dingdong]

As a pack leader he had to constantly check the borders for intruders. His whole body was arched ready to attack if any threat came his way. He never knew when he would have to put up a fight. Of course he was well equiped for fighting, having to fight with his pack at times. His old pack that was, the one he left behind. He was having trouble missing any of them. They had never been a huge part of his life. To think that he left them thinking he was dead. It had been the only way he was capable of leaving.

A loud howl was heard making his ears prick forward. Who was this stranger who walked upon his lands? All Skye knew for a fact was that he was ready to fight if a need for it came. He held the land dear to him, with all his heart. No one would have it except him. Rounding the corner he looked up ahead to find a she-wolf and another male wolf. They didn't seen harmful and he let himself relax a little bit. He was an anxious wolf, a trait inherited from his mother.

He smiled at them, showing nothing but kindness. He didn't want to be looked at as a bad guy. "May I ask what you're doing on my territory?" His voice was soft and gentle for a leader, but he did not want to sound mean

[shadow]

As Sermon howled for the alpha, Asha felt a small bit of worry flash through her again, but when she saw the look on her mate's face it disappeared again. If he thought that this was the right thing to do, then she was going to trust him and go with it. After all, wasn’t that what mates do? She just tried to keep calm as they waited to see it Sermon’s call would be answered. They didn’t have to wait long.

Soon a red-brown wolf with large black antlers entered her vision, and walked toward them. Asha had a feeling he was the pack leader, and when he asked what they were doing in his territory, it only confirmed said suspicions. She took a deep breath, and answered her voice as calm, friendly and steady as she could make it. “My name is Asha and this is my mate, Sermon. We were wondering if you had room in your pack for two more. ” She could tell that she was beyond nervous right now, and wondered how apparent that would be to the Alpha.

Still, she had sermon with her, and that alone gave her strength and hope. Besides, even if they didn’t join this pack, then they could find another. However, she liked how friendly this wolf was, how he didn’t seem hostile or, she didn’t know, calculating and cold as Tsuz had been. ‘If this was the leader, then what could the pack be like?’ she wondered, knowing that sometimes the personality of the leader could reflect in the pack. She just might like it if that was what was in store for her.

[oatmeal]

[style=font: 11px calibri; letter-spacing: 1px; text-align: right; width: 412px; background-color: #282823; padding: 2px 10px; color: #8f9cab;]settled on the sermon

As the leader approached, Sermon looked to Asha, immediately worried for her. She didn't seem too keen on the idea at first, but when she stepped up and introduced the both of them, shared their intentions, he knew that his mate was on board with the idea as well. And so far, it seemed to be a good enough choice. The antlered male appeared rather down to earth. He wasn't haughty or pompous like some other Alphas could be. He seemed to be on their same plane, understanding them as wolves and not simply as underlings. He didn't bribe them or try to influence them with prizes. And, what Tsuz had done, manners that stank of fakeness and therefore, raises suspicion, this wolf didn't do. He was all business. He waited for them to approach his pack. He didn't try to round up followers. Perhaps that was why Sermon was immediately certain that he was going to join this pack.

Sermon would rely on his mate in order to function in the pack as a productive citizen. There was an eagerness in the way he looked at Skye—he wanted this. A small ounce of a dark expectation was in his emerald eyes. He expected to be turned away. Simply because he had been turned away before, by other wolves. Sermon knew that his condition was hard to deal with, that perhaps this Alpha wasn't ready for a pack member who wasn't completely normal. He wanted to say something. To reveal it, but he was afraid that it would hurt his chances. Besides, Asha was there to support him.

What he could do was show initiative. He had the potential to be an effective and upstanding member of the pack. Sermon kept himself polite, but confident. "I have a lot to offer and I'm willing to give it." Sermon's eyes held a sharp kind of intelligence: Cold, calculating, but fair. His prehensile tail was strong and he had the know-how to use it. He was of a medium size. More agile than strong, but in a group, agility could be important. In a fight, maneuvers trumped hard hits. Asha had a lot to offer too, but he didn't want to speak for her. His actions told the story though. The soft way he'd glance at her. The way his tail would barely touch her, as if to make sure she was still there. He needed her. And he knew it.

Sermon kept himself steady. His breath felt stiff in his nervous chest. He didn't know what would come out of this interaction. But, at least, he thought that he absolutely deserved it. This was meant to be his pack. He wasn't going to settle for another.

Sermon is awkward, but he would very much like to join this pack. He's very sure :D